Posted in childhood, life

This is now.

I remember Jimmy Carter on the TV when I was just a kid
on the giant tv in our living room
with the gold shag carpet.
It was nothing I understood about politics
or political matters
but my parents liked Jimmy Carter.
I was a kid
so I liked him too.
Politics and government actions are amorphous.
Spooky and ever changing.
Not solid.
Not anything you really want to know.
Not anything you really need to know.
You can believe,
or not.
Its fire after fire
and money
and things you will never understand.
Thank goodness.
My mother and I are back in the same corner
After a few years of not.
We have secret conversations of
Can you believe?
and I just don’t understand…
Can’t you do something?
I will try.
I will try.
It’s what we do.
Posted in life

puzzle

In the dark I can figure out in seconds which key opens the door
From all those times
its the gold one and it feels different
even in the dark
like a puzzle piece
solved
it lets me in.
Sharp and pointed teeth
open
to my curvy and comfortable world.
My puzzle piece
feels like
an S or maybe a J
sloping and lazy sometimes.
An afternoon nap.
Puffy clouds.
It might be inches away from straight lines and solid shapes
but it forms.
And you and you
are right around the corner
fitting
Just fine.
Its always been that way.
We are the pieces
the composition
the topic
the outlines
Together.
Posted in life

We are here.

Empathy.
I believe that one is missing.
And value.
Of all that which doesn’t require calculation.
Heartbeats and half hearts
Heaviness.
Pricelessness.
Cats in the living room
Dogs in the backyard
Babies and storms.
And your man on the sidewalk
Your woman answering the door.
Ring that bell.
It’s me. It’s you.
We.
Stop starting.
Don’t look back or sideways
Straight ahead.
All together
Now.
Go.

 

Posted in childhood, family, life

Birthday

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I have a picture of my sister
On her 6th birthday
1976.
Bicentennial year. Long blonde hair
Smiling and sunny.
Standing behind her Cinderella birthday cake
3 days before Independence day.
Fairy tales over flags.
Of course.
She is wearing blue and red.
My mother wrote 6 years

In her perfect handwriting on the back.

When I was in 2nd grade
we celebrated the Bicentennial.
Before school was out.
There are pictures of me wearing a bonnet with bad short hair.
An apron and a floor length red white and blue skirt.
We made butter in our classroom and ate it on saltine crackers.
Paper flags and boats.
I am smiling.
An unfortunate haircutΒ and a patriotic skirt.

 

I went to an old elementary school.

It had a giant pecan tree on the playground.
If you threw a kickball at the branches
The pecans would fall in bunches.
Every other year.

 

We had show and tell on the carpet
sitting in a semi circle.
I brought in a Kennedy half dollar that had been made into a paperweight.
I’m not sure what I had to tell about that. Mostly show.
I think it belonged to my father.

 

This was the year I got a silver skateboard necklace from Santa.
Santa ordered it from Avon.
The deck was red white and blue.
Because
1976.

 

On the 4th we had fireworks.
And probably hamburgers
With American cheese.
The ice cream truck. Cap guns.
Waiting until the sun went down.
Then.
Bottle rockets and sparklers mostly.
On the sidewalk in front of our house.

 

Sparklers can’t hurt you. But don’t point them at your sister.
You can run with them though.
Fast.
In the front yard.
In the backyard.
Declaring independence.